


Unavoidable entanglement

by starhitchhiker



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Crying, Dubious Consent, F/M, Mild Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-27
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-05-09 18:10:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5550320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starhitchhiker/pseuds/starhitchhiker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She was sure he would get tired of her eventually, finally leaving her be. That is, until her very well buried emotion that encourages humans to help each others stupidly decided to come out and play</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Unavoidable

She was not sure how everything happened and she was not likely going to dwell that much in thoughts that would surely leave her with a pounding headache.

The first time she realized he was looking at her, she had been terrified. Especially because she was perfectly aware that her thoughts, in the last year or so, were probably to be considered high treason. Like almost everybody else on the star cruiser -as well as on their base planet- she had been abducted as a child, somewhere, and conditioned into a loyal member of the First Order.

Too bad she was starting to think that this whole idea was just big bullshit. By protocol, she should have already reported her problem to the infirmary and have her reconditioning sequence scheduled. It was that, or waiting for someone to notice it and be subject to even more unpleasant consequences.

The problem was, when you start to think with your own brain it's difficult to relinquish the claim on your life.

So, when she first felt the tingle on her nape, suggesting that someone was staring at her, she had felt absolute shock in seeing the leather-and-metal mask reflected on the polished surface of the command console. Of course it had to be the only man on the entire cruiser able to see right through her.

_Shit. It's allright, just paranoia. He's not looking at you, he's just keeping an eye on the control panel._

But the sensation of being observed hasn't stopped since then. It could sneak up on her when she was walking down a corridor, or helping herself in the mess hall. She had walked right into a wall once, while quietly trying to look behind her, earning the amused chuckle of a couple of nearby stormtrooper.

When he finally cornered her in a deserted locker room, she was almost happy to face her destiny once and for all.

She was expecting pain, treats, anger. Maybe even disappointment.

He removed his helmet instead.

From there on, everything was confused. She vaguely remembered an attempt to impersonate some kind of out-of-water fish - gaping, mesmerized by the absolute _nonsense_ of whatever she was seeing.

Then.. Well, call it relief to not be killed on sight, or the simple fact that you can't say no to Kylo Ren and not expect repercussions, she had somehow become his lover for a few weeks now, and it didn't seem to be going to an end anytime soon.

She would have gladly avoided this development, since it meant she had not been able to sleep well anymore in fear of him slipping suddenly inside her mind. Luckily, he preferred to slip into something else altogether - pun intended.

At least, he was a pretty good lover although definitely a dominant one. Not handsome by any extent, but he was all hot skin and hard planes and _so friggin' tall_ , with clever fingers and a _really_ wicked tongue.

She was glad he was never looking at her while plunging wildly into her body, probably imagining somebody else in her place or just using her as a temperature controlled toy.

She has, after all, a pretty plain appearance. Average height, dirty blond hairs, brown eyes. Perfect if you want to keep it neutral.

He used to come in her room whenever he wanted, seeming alarmingly aware of her schedule. One hour or so later he was away again, working his way to the universal dominion with lighter...spirit.

Out of the privacy of the four walls of plasteel she was entitled with, he never acknowledged her, which was totally fine. She was sure he would get tired of her eventually, finally leaving her be.

That is, until her very well buried emotion that encourages humans to help each others stupidly decided to come out and play.

* * *

She didn't know what happened, but he had been away for a few days when his fighter came back, wings folding themselves once parked on the large landing field inside the hangar. And he was hurt.

When he marched into the control room, followed by a very distressed Hux, he was limping and his voice lacked the usual fearful determination.

Looking back, it was very stupid from her part to follow him when he left the room, but she was supposed to have him sign the papers for the new equipment.

Stupid, stupid bureaucracy.

Even stupider soundproofing.

Hearing nothing at all, when she pushed the release button to open the automatic door behind which he was hiding, she was met by a swing of his lightsaber so close to the face that she recoiled with a shout, landing on her ass as the neat pile of papers she was carrying floated lazily to the floor.

The once meeting room was a mass of broken furniture and dented plasteel, electronic wiring still frizzing in their once insulated containers.

He looked taken aback and for once all she saw was a scared, scarred and terrified young man, still bleeding from where an hastily discarded mask had scratched its cheekbones.

"What are you.." he started, furious.

"Stop!" she shouted, struggling to gain vertical position again. "What are you, crazy?!" she asked, pointing both at the trashed room and his dishevelled appearance.

_She didn't. She fucking did not just screamed to the possibly more unstable person on the whole friggin' cruiser. Oh, god gracious._

He blinked, clearly even more shocked that her.

Self preservation kicked in and she acted quickly, not letting him recover before moving inside the room to place an hand on is side, suppressing a squeal of horror as it came back bloodied.

"You are hurt, Sir. Just.. Go to the medical bay. I will see to this disaster." she suggested, barely gaining enough courage to lift her eyes towards his face.

He was cold has stone.

But he didn't object, marching away without a word.

It required a lot of promised favours to shut the mouths of the cleaners.

* * *

Later, that night, his coming was not a surprise at all.

When she heard the door open she didn't even turned from her position at her desk. She wasn't that eager to face her killer.

After a few minutes of silence, anyway, things started to look pretty weird and she dared to glance over her shoulder.

He was standing against the door, arms folded on his chest. For the briefest moment, she imagined her unannounced neighbour pushing the opening button of her door to invite her for a late night tea and finding herself with an armful of Kylo Ren falling backwards.

She couldn't suppress a smile.

"I could have killed you. I still should, right now, for I can't accept Hux's minions to interfere with me. Whatever it is I decide to do."

His voice was ice-cold but his body was trembling with barely repressed fury.

She paled considerably, trying hard to swallow.

"I'm sorry Sir. I realize I was completely out of place. I will accept whatever punishment you thinks it's..."

She never ended the phrase. He moved so swiftly that she almost didn't see him, finding herself pulled up on her feet and pushed hard against the wall, pinned in place by a strong couple of gloved hand.

"But I understand, now"

_Oh fuck. He's so made he's going to strangle me with bare hands._

Then, he slammed his lips against hers and she lost her train of thoughts. He had never kissed her before, and now he was positively devouring her, his tongue delving inside her mouth to explore.

"Where you worried about me, little mouse?" he murmured against her hear, nibbling gently at her neck. Her ears were still ringing after being smashed against a wall when he cradled gently her neck, gathering her in his arms with a surprising tenderness. "Yes, I think you were. More scared _for_ me than _by_ me."

_What-the-hell?_

He deposited her on the cot, peeling away her grey tracksuit and dragging his fingers on her ribs in a teasing caress. "Your heart is beating fast, like a little bird. Hux would not be glad of your interest for me."

Two of his fingers slid inside her cunt, still gloved. The sudden fullness bordered on pain and she whimpered, trying to move away. He wasn't having any of it, and with just a swift motion of his hand she found herself unable to move her legs.

"Shht. I will not hurt you. I know what you want."

His voice was suddenly loving while he was leaving a wet trail of kisses from her neck, between her breasts, through her stomach... Down at the apex of her thighs.

She screamed in pleasure as his warm tongue found her clit, moving gently over it in a soothing, circular pattern. He slowed down, his restrain slacking while, carefully, with his fingers and his mouth, coaxed her in a screaming orgasm.

Later he made her ride him, murmuring endearing words while controlling her rhythm with his hands on her hips. He was loud, uninhibited in his pleasure when he asked her to suck him fast and hard before rolling her down beneath him a making love to her with slow, rough thrusts that left her crying in pleasure and frustration both.

When he finally came, collapsing on her with a moan, she was looking at him with wide, scared eyes.

"What is it?" he asked, sleepy.

"...my room is not soundproofed." she lied, hoping that he would not investigate further.

She could swear he was laughing in the pillow.


	2. Running away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sitting in the only chair in the corner, arms folded and hood lifted on his head, was a familiar black silhouette.  
> "Fuck"  
> "Indeed."

Drowning.

Where she came from, it was a pretty common way of dying, even if she had no real experience of it. She had her files smuggled from the database once, and did some research.

Her native planet was covered almost completely by oceans and since then she had dreamed a lot about water. Well, about drowning more precisely, since she wasn't able to swim.

So, the feeling of being crushed under the pressure of a large mass of water, the difficulty to expand her chest for breathing... It was not the first time she woke up to them.

But somehow, this time, they didn't seem to end with the regained conciousness.

She looked down.

And stifled a scream.

* * *

Half an hour later she was still frozen in position, looking at the top of Kylo Ren's head, still soundly asleep on her chest.

That's for sure, she never though he was the kind of man that liked to cuddle.

She wondered who he really was, this young, love-starved man living his life beneath a mask.

_God, he must have some serious affection problems if he is that prone to cling on the first sign of care._

He had never stayed before, and she didn't like the new development one bit. She was pretty sure she was crossing a line that was better left blurred.

She might even be able to kill him right now, if she had the courage to act. It said a lot that he never thought of her as a threat, about his stupidity... Or about how well he judged her.

Too coward to condemn herself to certain death by doing something so foolish: she was in a battle starship in the middle of the space, where could she run away?

He chose that moment to wake up, stretching like a goddamned cat and sending tingles of pleasure to her brain with his soft hairs sliding on her skin.

She swallowed.

"I have to go."

"You'll stay here till I say otherwise"

"My shift starts in half an hour. I'm already late, the general..."

His sudden anger was like a physical blow, and she winced.

The way he bit her nipple, viciously, effectively restraining her under his strong body...

He got what he wanted in the end, but he wasn't as gentle as before. Not at all.

She was completely unprepared when he entered her, a grunt of pure male satisfaction while keeping her motionless, one large hand pinning her wrists and the other one on her thigh, urging her to cross her ankles on his back and hang on for dear life.

He slowly stroked her hair after, lifting her head to look in her eyes: he was silent for a long moment, taking in her dishevelled figure. "I think I will keep you." he decided, a small smile on the lips before rolling out of the cot.

She was on the verge of crying when he finally started to gather his clothes.

_He's like a violent kid with a puppy. He likes the idea of being loved and so he wants to keep it safe, but when he will feel the need to experiment with pain it will still be his first test subject._

How could have she been that stupid?

He had never, not even for an instant, stopped looking in her eyes.

* * *

When the general first saw her, a bruise on her cheek and a swollen lip where someone had bit _hard_ , he moved out of the control room. Even if he sometimes favoured to look clueless on certain topics, there was little he didn't knew about what was happening on his ship. And he definitely didn't like that knight of Ren.

A couple of hours later, she was still sitting on her armchair, eyes fixed on the control panel when Hux shook her gently to gain her attention.

"The new base on Anarres requires a communication technician. I decided to sent you. Pack your stuff, you will leave in three hours."

For the second time that day she felt like crying, but this time it was simply relief.

* * *

Two weeks, standard time. Barely more than eleven days on a planet where the day-cycle is made of thirty hours.

It was a good place to be, even though in the rainy forest the temperature was stifling, the local mosquito almost big as a human hand and she still had to get used to the different day length.

She wasn't sure what was happening. Rumours had spread on the base about Resistance attacking First Order's cruisers, but the complete story never left the communication room. And, com technician as she was, her job there was just antennas maintenance: no exciting news, but at least she was entitled to a double ration of food.

That fourteenth day, after the shift, all she was thinking about while entering her cell, was to remove the soaked uniform and take a cold shower. Instead, sitting in the only chair in the corner, arms folded and hood lifted on his head, was a familiar black silhouette.

"Fuck"

"Indeed."

She felt the pull of the Force when he used it on her, throwing her against the wall and keeping her still. Her feet intercepted her heavy metal toolbox in her backward fly and she stifled a shout of pain.

"It took quite a long time to find you. That is, because I didn't know who to ask." his voice was calm, but she couldn't see his face behind the mask. It was impossible to read his mood, like that. Sha was pretty sure that 'chilled' was _not_ a good description of it, anyway. "The general itself? Well played. Tell me, did you spread your legs for him too? I always thought he was a pouf, but maybe I am wrong."

Calm voice, almost disinterested in the subject. She could smell the trap miles before her and chose to stay silent.

"I see I have to find my answers by myself"

One moment she was struggling against a death grip on her arms, the one after the grip shifted to her brain. It was everything she had always tried to avoid: her thoughts bare in front of his prying curiosity, a diffused pain behind her eyelids while he roamed her memories for his own sake, dissecting all their moments together. She just stopped resisting when that first -and last- awakening together was brought in front of him, along with all her concerns: best to give him what he wanted that let him discover her most treacherous ideas. The scene unfolded until she was met by the eyes of general Hux. Full of actual pity.  
Pity for what she was going through, pity for her having to deal with _him_.

He recoiled brutally.

"Ah. That's why you ran away"

He clenched his fists in an obvious attempt to stop his need to strike her.

"You should have just refused me from the beginning. You were just convenient. A pretty nobody with luscious lips, like thousand others. I would have let you go."

If his words were meant to strike her ego, he was sadly mistaken.

"I'm still a nobody. Why don't you..."

She felt like he was crushing her windpipe while not even looking at her. She was actually starting to suffocate when whatever was keeping her in mid air died away, letting her collapse to the ground with a wretched need to either cough or throw up. Or both together, more likely.

"That will not happen. You are coming back with me." he swiftly crouched in front of her, hands on his knees while he leaned towards her, invading her personal space.

"You have liked me once, I saw it. You will, again. I always get what I want."

She just openly started to cry at that.

Sometimes, it was difficult to remember that, beneath the monstrous mask of metal and hate, there was a man maybe even younger than her.

* * *

On the cruiser, she had to report to her direct superior on the main bridge to have her badge and starship uniform back. All the time, she felt Hux watching her, but when she glanced in his direction he just shook his head quietly.

Nothing to do.

Kylo Ren was kept away by classified duties until the day after and she was trying not to think at what would happen to her at that moment.

That's when the siren started to ring.

The Resistance was attacking, taking advantage of the distance from the battleship of their more formidable adversary.

_Hostiles infiltrated the base, kill on sight. All technical personnel is required to evacuate to facilitate military operations._

It was just too good to be true. It felt like fucking karma.

She might have been a coward, but she definitely was not a stupid. She quickly formulated a plan, one of those stupid, high-failure percentage plans.

 _Looks like there actually is a point where the fear covers for lack of courage_ \- she mused.

* * *

On the third bridge, a couple of assaulter where cornering a young man with the Resistance logo etched on his leather jacket and a bag full of what looked like high potential explosives.

"C'mon, put down those blasters. Sure as hell your boss would prefer to see me alive, we've already met a couple of times you know?" he was suggesting, both hands in the air while slowly walking backwards.

Whatever he wanted to obtain by delaying the inevitable, he didn't required in the end since the troopers fell down without a sound.

Well, no sound of their own, because two 'PEW PEW' coming from _another_ blaster at their unsuspecting back could clearly be heard.

It was the most gaunt trooper he'd ever seen, since his armour was definitely too large in many places. When he charged rapidly in his direction, shouting "The ventilation shaft, you idiot!" he could do nothing but comply.

"What the hell are you doing?!" he reprimanded, hands still up while pushed in the aforementioned shaft with a gun between his shoulder blades "And why is your respirator connected backwards?"

"FUCK. I just saved your life, now you will bring me out of here with you!" replied the trooper, tossing down the blaster to fiddle with the helmet.

"Woah, AGAIN? What's up with you guys, First Order doesn't believe in productivity bonus?" he _was_ trying to reach for the blaster, but it was so damn tight in that shaft he could barely move his arms.

When the helmet was removed, he found himself face to face with a woman with dirty blond hair falling haphazardly around her face.

"Oh. That's an improvement, though. What is your name?"

She smiled. "You know, that's the first time somebody asks it to me."

It wasn't an answer, but he still helped her, of course. He was nothing if not a chivalrous knight in Resistance's armour.

* * *

On a far, far away planet, in an hard cot with not enough blanket to keep her nicely insulated from the chilled air, she was sleeping like a child.

After more than ten hours of interrogation and a huge amount of hot beverage with cream she had been dismissed by an equally tired Resistance general who had looked at her with a strange mix of pity and guilt for the whole time while hearing her story.

That night, she dreamed again of her watery planet, inhaling happily the heady scent of salt and sun.

This time, she wasn't drowning.

This time, she had wings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this could be much longer, but i'm too lazy.  
> Also, english is not my native language, be gentle with my stupid mistakes!  
> Peace!


End file.
